Am I Crazy?


Harry Potter Wars

What is this magic, cried Professor Quirrell as his arm turned to dust.

Someone give this man a hand! Harry joked.

Master! Help me!

You think your master will help you? Did he never tell you? Tell you the truth about my father?

He told me enough. He told me he killed him.

Then there's something I must reveal to you... He's my father!

No... No... That's not true. It's IMPOSSIBLE!

Heh, heh, heh... Bored now... Avada Kedavra, Harry suddenly uttered and Professor Quirrell knew nothing more.


Sportsballing

And so Commissioner Goodell asked, "How we make the game of sportball more exciting?"

The young sage answered... "Eight equals ten."

"I... I don't understand."

The sage motioned for silence. He continue, "Tick, tock, tick, tock, time never stops and so should you."


That which I have forgotten... That which I might remember...

It's just Stevia, the man said.

I prefer pure cane sugar, I thought to myself. Chopped down with a machette...

SOMEBODY STOLE MY MACHETTE, a women cried in my head.

I flood of memories entered my head. I quickly remember there was no way she could have actually said that in english as what I was remembering was the subtitle text. Where was that from I pondered PBS? Nova? I doubted if I ever remember.


Very many transition between the two hyperfine levels of the ground state of caesium-133 ago in a large collection of stars bound by the gravitational force most far...

I have a secret I've been keeping from you, Luke said.

Well come on, out with it! Han urged.

The Jedi... Luke paused, The Jedi are not who you think they are. The Jedi are not servants of the Force, but are slaves to it. For thousands of years we have been draining the life force from those around us. We did so in secret, trying to never take so much at one time, or in one place to be noticed. For generations, we misled the galaxy, tricking the masses into thinking we were campions of justice when in fact crimes we solved and the villains we captured were all an elaborately planned masquerade.

What are you saying, questioned Leia. What are we?

We're.... VAMPIRES. Luke responded.


The 6th Day of 4th Month in 2014th Year of the Common Era

Are you sure you want the two patty one? She asked.

Yes. I insisted.

Whatever, she probably thought as she eyed my skinny demeanor in utter disbelieve that a man such as myself could consume two patties worth of cheeseburger. When she spoke again it was not directed at my person, but at the busy kitchen behind her shouting that she had two.

I like that with barbecue sauce, pickle, tomatoes, and grilled onions. And a regular fry and regular Coke. I added.

Do you want salt on those fries? she asked.

I paused, momentarily stunned at the prospect that anyone would server french fries without salt. Not quite knowing how to respond I answered that I would like them just they way the come. Hoping that my fries would indeed come salted like all good fries should.

You are number 28. She said handing me my receipt.

Number 28, I thought to myself. What an unpretentious number. As I briefly mulled over it's mathematical properties. Before walking over to the self server drink machine. Regular Coke, with a lot of ice. Just the way I like it.